Yesterday was my grandparents 45th anniversary and my grandma was like “if I had killed him 20 years ago I would be out of jail by now” and that basically sums them up
Your grandma is 45?!
yeah she got married the day she was born
5:12 pm • 30 July 2014 • 359,557 notes
you have a fundamental misunderstanding of how math works
hey that means charity will also get unlimited money so I’m game
so both charity and I get unlimited money, sounds like a win win situation.
(Source: eternalgirlscout, via sleepingsmarts)
5:12 pm • 30 July 2014 • 338,092 notes
“Don’t marry a man unless you would be proud to have a son exactly like him.”
— Unknown (via obsessiveobsessions)r (via livelifetipsy)
(Source: capecodcollegiate, via fit-and-healthy-for-tomorrow)
5:07 pm • 30 July 2014 • 381,522 notes
"What’s been your greatest accomplishment?"
"Keeping in touch with distant friends and relatives."
"Why is that important?"
"I’s important to always have people who remember you at various stages of your life. It’s especially important as you get older, because there are less of those people around. And they remind you who you are."
4:12 pm • 30 July 2014 • 4,556 notes